Me and my brother like most siblings, were not always on the best of terms. When we were younger we spent a lot of time being jealous of one another, fighting over toys and our parents attention. It wasn’t until high school, maybe even more like college that we were able to actually sit and have real conversations with each other about things, our likes, dislikes, or the dreaded topic of all males, our feelings. My mother would get furious when we fought, she would always scold us about not just what we said to each other, but how we said it. The weight of your words is heavy, they can move a conversation or a person much more than most care to consider.

Thankfully we have now both graduated from college and become men with vigour, ambition, and very different views of the world. When we sit across from each other now, we can have a dialogue full of honesty, harsh truths, and even a little bit of laughter. This wonderful dialogue does not have to be reserved for just siblings and friends but can be accomplished with strangers as well. Today I want to share with you, a product of one of these amazing talks, my new found understanding of the words my mother used to say to us

“ It’s not about what you say, It’s about how you say it”.

Speak your truth, from a place of love, to do it any other way is a disservice to your message, to the intended recipient(s), and most importantly a disservice to yourself. To speak from a place of love is not always an easy task, at least it isn’t for me, it takes courage, patience, and energy. But what life has taught me, is that when you speak from a place of love, more often than not the energy you put out is given right back to you. Love begets love, truth begets truth, these are the nutrients that allow the beauty that is understanding to blossom.

I love to be an optimist but reality is also very appealing to me, I’m a black man in a world dominated by people who don’t look much like me. That has caused me, and many who look like me to be guarded, with our thoughts, with our emotions, with our truth, even with each other.

There has been a subtle shift in the culture, we finally are starting to acknowledge that mental health is important. Mental health is not just about going to see a therapist, which I have done, and highly recommend, mental health is about knowing who, what, where, and why you are. When you speak your truth, you get to hear it too, so like I said before speak it from a place of love, because when you don’t, it’s a disservice to your self.

Lastly I want to touch on speaking your truth with strangers, since it has been one of the great joys of my life. People seem to be either intrigued, insulted, or inspired when you do so, it’s not always easy to know when someone is telling the truth, but when it comes from a place of love, you can most definitely feel it. Even when I have conversations with individuals whom on the outside I would assume to be an “enemy”, I chose to speak my truth in love, and have had some of my most intrepid discussion. That old saying “don’t judge a book by its cover” , holds true, the contents of an ugly book can sometimes be extremely poignant, almost beautiful if read slowly, and with care.

Treat others, speak to others, and listen to others as you would have them to do you, from a place of love.

Thank you for taking the time to read my writing and visit my page, may peace and prosperity follow you wherever you may go